


Please Christmas Don't Be Late

by ChokolatteJedi



Category: House M.D.
Genre: Advent Calendar, Advent Calendar Drabble, Advent Challenge 2011, Gen, Mild Language, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-05
Updated: 2011-12-05
Packaged: 2017-10-27 00:07:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/289388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChokolatteJedi/pseuds/ChokolatteJedi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>House teaches the Ped ward a new song</p>
            </blockquote>





	Please Christmas Don't Be Late

**Author's Note:**

> Beta help from the wonderful Inforpenny! :D

Wilson burst into the diagnostics office to discover Greg smiling innocently. "I knew it!"

"Knew what?" House didn't even try to hide his grin.

"You taught the entire Ped ward the words to the Chipmunk song!" Wilson exclaimed.

"If you're referring to 'Christmas Don't Be Late' by Alvin and the Chipmunks, I have no idea what you're talking about," House replied evenly.

"Arg!" Wilson began to pace. "Where did you hide the CD player?"

"No idea what you're talking about," House repeated.

"If you don't tell me where you hid it then I'll- I'll-" Wilson stammered to a halt.

"Yes?" House prompted.

Wilson gave him a look that could have shattered glass. "I'll let Nurse Brenda come up here and she'll get the answer out of you!"

House's expression flickered for a second before he managed to hide his dismay. "If there's a CD player playing in Peds, why don't you ask the children where it is?"

"We have," Chase declared, stomping into the office. "They just giggled and said they didn't know."

"Well maybe you should ask nicely," House's voice was sickeningly sweet.

"I swear, if we don't shut that thing off soon you'll have a mob of nurses with pitchforks up here ready to cut your head off." Chase growled.

House frowned. "You can't _cut_ a head off with a pitchfork. Puncture, sure, b-"

"House!" Wilson shouted. "Where. Is. The. CD Player?"

Deciding on a different tactic, House shook his head and began to hold his breath.

"Oh my god!" Chase threw his hands up and stomped back out of the office. "I'm going back to Peds, where the maturity level is higher. Let me know if you get anything out of him."

Wilson crossed his arms and glared at House, as though daring the man to answer.

House checked his watch lazily.

"While I appreciate that you are attempting to get into the Christmas mood this year, do you really think this was the best way to do it?" Wilson finally broke the silence.

House considered this and then nodded.

"Despite the wrath of Nurse Brenda?" Wilson checked.

House considered this too and nodded again.

"Despite the fact that Cuddy despises that song?"

House's grin widened as much as it could with his cheeks puffed out and he nodded enthusiastically. Both men suddenly heard the sound of high heels clicking towards them. Wilson straitened and House continued to grin.

"What is this?" Cuddy demanded, bursting into the diagnostics office. She waved a small, crayon-covered piece of paper around, and Wilson took it from her hand.

"Christmas Wish list?" He read.

"One of the children handed it over." Cuddy told him before snapping back at House. "Is this how you get my attention? Is this what you want me to think of the next time you pull a stunt like the one you pulled in the OR last week?"

House smiled reminiscently and nodded again.

"One: hula-hoop. Two: monster truck. Three: new bouncy ball." Wilson shot a look of disgust at House. "On second thought, I _will_ just let Nurse Brenda have a go at you."

Frowning, House spun his finger around in a circle, then puffed his cheeks out wider.

Wilson flipped the letter over and quickly read the back. His frown deepened, and he shot an indecipherable look at House. "Did Cameron see this?" he asked Cuddy.

"Yes, why?"

"Did she leave in a hurry?"

Now Cuddy alternated between glaring at House and looking at Wilson in confusion. "I think so. She dragged Foreman off… Where is that CD player?"

House shook his head, but Wilson was already handing the letter over, back-side up.

 _"Any idiot could see that Leukemia boy isn't going to make it to the seventeenth, let alone the twenty-fifth. And the blonde one with the crack addiction won't last much longer. Their letters are on Brenda's desk. Do it today."_ Cuddy looked up at House in shock.

The lanky doctor just waved his hand at her and she looked back at the letter.

 _"I'm serious about the hula hoop, though. –House."_   


"So why the music? Why not just give that to Cameron?" Wilson asked with marked patience.

House just spun his finger again. Cuddy huffed, but Wilson took the note back from her and looked at the front. House pointed skyward and Wilson scanned the top. "December 13- you wrote this three days ago."

Finally giving up on turning blue, House sighed and nodded. "She needs to be more observant," He declared. "I thought this would serve as an excellent focuser."

"Where is the cd player?" Cuddy asked tiredly.

House grinned again and looked upwards. Unconsciously, Wilson and Cuddy mimicked him. "I don't understand!" Cuddy huffed.

"Hmmm." Wilson suddenly gasped and looked back down at House, who was smiling like a cat with a catnip mouse. "You clever son of a bitch," he whispered, before turning and running out of the office. Cuddy trailed behind, apparently deciding to forgo House's punishment for the time being.

House spared one last glance for the PA speaker in his ceiling and then settled back to his reading. "I still want a hula hoop," he sang softly.

**Author's Note:**

> All right you Chipmunks  
> Ready to sing your song  
> I'll say we ar  
> Yeah  
> Let's sing it now  
> Okay, Simon  
> Okay  
> Okay, Theodore  
> Okay  
> Okay, Alvin, Alvin, ALVIN  
> OKAY
> 
> Christmas, Christmas time is near  
> Time for toys and time for cheer  
> We've been good, but we can't last  
> Hurry Christmas, hurry fast  
> Want a plane that loops the loop  
> Me, I want a hula hoop  
> We can hardly stand the wait  
> Please Christmas, don't be late
> 
> Okay fellas get ready  
> That was very good, Simon  
> Naturally  
> Very good Theodore  
> Ahhh  
> Ah, Alvin, you were a little flat, watch it  
> Ah, Alvin, Alvin, ALVIN  
> OKAY
> 
> Want a plane that loops the loop  
> I still want a hula hoop  
> We can hardly stand the wait  
> Please Christmas, don't be late  
> We can hardly stand the wait  
> Please Christmas, don't be late
> 
> Very good, boys  
> Let's sing it again  
> Yeah, lets sing it again  
> No, That's enough, let's not overdo it  
> What do you mean overdo it  
> We want to sing it again  
> Now wait a minute, boys  
> Why can't we sing it again  
> Chipmunk chatter  
> Alvin, cut that out… Theodore, just a minute  
> Simon will you cut that out? Boys...


End file.
